Ebook Download The Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions So You and Your Children Can Thrive
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The Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions So You and Your Children Can Thrive
Ebook Download The Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions So You and Your Children Can Thrive
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Review
“Finally, an internationally respected scholar tells parents the absolute truth about divorce and its effect on children.”—John Gottman, PhD, author of The Heart of Parenting: Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
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From the Back Cover
"Finally, an internationally respected scholar tells parents the absolute truth about divorce and its effect on children." —John Gottman, PhD, author of The Heart of Parenting: Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
Read more
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Product details
Paperback: 336 pages
Publisher: Plume; Reprint edition (January 31, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 9780452287167
ISBN-13: 978-0452287167
ASIN: 0452287162
Product Dimensions:
5.4 x 0.7 x 8.4 inches
Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
48 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#80,966 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Purchased for my younger brother after a particularly difficult and protracted divorce "battle" began resulting in "divorce casualties" (my nieces). His family counselor gave it rave reviews. (She called me to "source them", as she plans to use them in her practice.)Bought one for myself as well, as I'm one constant in their lives. (Again, kudos from the counselor!)Having worked in Family Law for many years, I feel this book is definitely worth the price to help loved ones going through this always-difficult situation where NO ONE "WINS" (ESPECIALLY when there are children involved).
I have now read this book for the third time as I suffer though a difficult separation. Every chapter has lessons that you will find valuable in different phases of the process. The advice is insightful, and I believe dead on. It's the book that you want your high conflict partner to be reading and acting on (if you can somehow get them to read it).The focus is on the kids and the impact on them. The examples are useful to show how your behavior may put you kids in the middle. It is reassuring (and with studies) to show that impact of divorce does not have to ruin your kids for life. That's not to mean that it's a feel good book, rather it is saying that if you choose to act one way, then married or not your kids are going to suffer. But, if you can behave in a constructive and businesslike way the impacts are likely to be much less in the longer term.The real nuggets focus on how you feel and has great descriptions of the feelings you are likely to be going through, how that may affect your actions. For those that like these explanations it can give you some cause and effect. Of particular interest to me right now is a section on the different reactions and mindset of the person who is leaving the mariage (the 'leaver') and the left. Because the leaver has a headstart on the left their dynamics are almost predictable between them. There is a very insightful discussion on the cycle of anger, sadness and grief that permeates these situations.The message of the book is (especially for high conflict), to take the emotion out of the husband-wife relationship, and focus on creating a very business like relationship, (often communicated over short emails) tha focuses on the remaining thing you share in common: your children. While that sounds cold, there is a logic behind it that is abundantly explained in examples and it's all for the benefit of the kids.
My mom recommended this book to me and my ex wife. It helped both of us. We stopped fighting and are actually friends now. I started reading it and was like wow I'm guilty of some of the negative behaviors and I didn't realize it. This is not a preachy book or a caudling book but more of a solution book.
I heard of Dr. Emery from several child development specialists I met at a seminar. They consider him to be the current expert. I bought several volumes (at full price) to give to my clients who were contemplating divorce and wanted to know what was best for their children.My clients have raved about the book. They quote it to me, highlight sections and bring in the book with lots of bookmarks. The advice is practical and helps the clients focus on the important issues. I work with people on cooperative divorce (see divorcewithoutwar.info) and this information helps me accomplish our goal of working for the best interests of the children and keeping the divorce process civil.I recomend this book to any one with children who is contemplating a divorce. It will really help them make good decisions and hopefully make the entire process less stressful.
Best book I've read on the topic. It really opened my eyes to what my child is going through.
I have not read too many books on this topic but it was recommended by my lawyer. It is extremely helpful for me to understand the thought processes of my self and my soon-to-be ex. There were a lot of "That was me." moments in the book. It also provides a very comprehensive analysis of the different options in separation and divorce. The one I am most interested in was the chapters on the parenting plans of children. It was very reassuring to learn about the expert opinion and experience.
While this book contained some helpful tips and examples, it was too basic and concrete for my taste.
Prompt, as Stated, PleasedGood book to read so as to understand that your child does not see divorce from your perspective.It was a real convenience to be able to purchase this item on line. Thank you.
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